A Birthday, Plus The Good and Bad

Well I am another year older, the big 31.

My birthday was pretty uneventful. I got everything I wanted and had a good meal at Lupe Tortilla's. Wait, scratch that. I ordered a good meal at Lupe Tortilla's but had to go home because Jacob stepped on glass in the sandbox. Lesson: don’t let your child play in a strange sandbox without shoes. Actually, we still had a good time.

My Cancer:
First, the not-so-good news. I am officially losing my hearing. It is a common side effect of one of the drugs (cisplatin) and the doctors are not surprised. If it is progressive, they may consider changing drugs but no real consequence yet. As far as I am concerned, I could care less. Hearing aids can be very cool. Also, who wouldn't like to be able to turn their ears off every once in a while?

The nodule in my lung continues to be stable. That means it hasn't grown or shrunken. No real news there. It is interesting that because they have not biopsied this (gone in and tested a piece of it), they don't know that it is malignant. It could just be a benign nodule.

Now, the great news. The cancer in my belly has definitely been shrinking. This indicates a response to the treatment. Now, I know I said I was responding to the treatment when my belly stopped filling up, but this is proof. My cancer IS GOING AWAY. I love this news; it validates all of the crap that I have been through in the last 4-5 months.

Also, since my belly isn't filling up with fluid, they feel comfortable giving me all of the drugs at once instead of two stages. They have canceled my outpatient treatment and will give all the drugs to me when I go into the hospital next Monday. I should still only be there about 7 days, so that's actually pretty cool. It will be interesting to see if the bad effects build on each other, or if I just feel as crappy as I usually do. Either way, I get a couple more days off before I have to begin. Life is sweet and the small pleasures make a difference.

Family:
My older brother came into town and we had a great time. That is, until my family got into a big fight. Oh well, this stuff happens in a close family. Everyone will get over it and we will all be back (almost) to normal. By the way, if you know my family, don't call/email for details about what happened. If it was your business you would already know.

Jennifer is sick with pneumonia, and is feeling like crap. I can't do much to help, because nothing much helps. At least I have a few more days to be home, taking care of her. God knows she has taken care of me enough in the last few months.

All in all, I am a happy dude. I do have something to say that I hope some of you will think about.

My cancer has shown me both the immediacy of life and the unimportance of most of the things we do. If your life ended tomorrow, would you be happy with what you have done with it? Would you be proud of how you acted, how you treated other people, or even yourself? Do what needs to be done, and spend the rest of the time loving somebody.

Oh, and smile at the people in the drive-through; it can be contagious.

I love you all!
Peace.

P.S. check out the new baldy pic at the top right.

The Movie Critic

Hello! Hola! Bonjour! Yo!

So, I have not been very busy. Jennifer has been in Arizona since last Friday, and I have been holding the fort down here at the house. Jake was with her for the weekend and I had the house all to myself. I played video games and watched movies. Quick movie reviews:

• Jarhead: Good movie, reminds me of Full Metal Jacket. Worth seeing.
• V for Vendetta: Better than I expected. Kind of a "smart" movie. Lots of quotes from classical philosophers and great action scenes.
• Deep Water: A strange "twisty-turny" movie. Reminded me of U-Turn with Sean Penn.
• This Thing of Ours: Good modern day mob movie. Not great.
• Munich: Long long long. Not as good as I had hoped. Bring a pillow.
• Underworld, Evolution: If you like the other Underworld movies, you will like this one.

As far as my cancer goes, there is no doubt in my mind that I am getting better. I have been feeling so good and operating and almost 100%. I just don't feel sick. When I bounce back from the treatments now, I really bounce back.

I go next Tuesday the 22nd for "re-staging". They do this every two treatments to determine how effective they are. I will have about 10 different tests (blood, x-ray, cat, mri)
. Then, on Wednesday, the doctor will tell me how great everything looks (hopefully). Cross your fingers.

I will start another chemo round the next day. Outpatient for a week then the hospital for a week. Interesting change: I will be studying for classes while I am doing the treatment. I m taking two classes for my MBA this semester, Futures and Options and an Accounting class. Wish me luck!

Well, that's pretty long for now. I am going to get back to my X-Box. I love you all and I will have real news on my cancer next Tuesday.

Life is a garden, dig it.

No More Belly Tube

Wow! What response!

It looks like most people want me to post whatever I want. That's good, because I would have anyway ;)

OK, last you heard from me I had done the outpatient chemo and was going back for the inpatient portion. For the most part, the chemo sucked. They give me two drugs inpatient, IL-2 and Interferon-A. The IL-2 is an immune system booster, and makes me sick to my stomach. The Interferon is a synthetic version of the chemical messenger in your body that tells you that you have the flu. They call the side effects shake-and-bake. This is because I alternate between horrible chills (warm blankets, wool hats, etc...) and fevers of 102+.

The combination of the these two drugs is just miserable. Not to mention they give me about five other drugs with them, including dopamine. They give me the the dopamine to increase my blood pressure. It also makes my heart rate stay at about 100 beats a minute the whole time I am on it.

So, that's the dirty truth. The good news is that they took the catheter out of my belly. I haven't had to drain any belly fluid, so it was pretty much useless.

I have been thinking alot about life expectancy lately. It seems that even if I go into "permanent" remission, this will be something I will deal with for the rest of my life. The odds are in favor of me fighting this cancer again. I will beat this cancer this time, but I just can't realistically look forward to living to 100 anymore. I know it is depressing but what the hell? I can't be a ray of sunshine all the time.

Right now I am just looking forward to my birthday. It is in less than two weeks and my family is going out for a nice dinner. I will have been out of the hospital for a long time so I should be able to enjoy the food. I might even try a glass of wine or two :)

Well, sorry this isn't my usual pick-me-up post. I'm sure I'll be in a better mood in a few days.

later.

What Do You Want?

Ok guys, try to be democratic here. I am going to ask the readers of "Fighting in Texas" what you want out of my blog. Would you rather:

• Clinical descriptions of treaments, how they are going, my reactions, and changes to the treatments.
• Funny missives coming from a man (that's right) with cancer, light on the tech descriptions.
• Deep ponderings about the meaning of life, and how they fit into my families situation.
• Pictures of me and my family.

you guys let me know either through email or comment on the blog. If you don't have my email, I am sure you can get it :)

BTW Jake and Jen are going to the Wiggles today!

Nothing Special, Just an Update

What is up?

Things have been pretty cool around here. Jake has been alternating between two year-old terror and angel of joy. Jen has been working hard but finding time to spend at home too. All in all, we are a very happy family. :)

I did the outpatient part of my chemo and for the most part, I like it. It only takes about four hours and going home afterwords is awesome compared to staying in the hospital. The only gripe I have is that the nurses in the outpatient clinic don't seem to be as knowledgable about the drugs as the inpatient nurses. More than once I had to correct the nurse as to the timing or order of my drugs.

I go back into the hospital today for the rest of my treatment. I can't say I am excited to go, but I can handle seven days no problem (compared to the twelve to fifteen I am used to).

I have started a new book, Still Here by Ram Dass. This guy is very deep. I am usually a fast reader but with this book, each page takes a minute. He says something profound in every paragraph and you have to stop and think about it. Pretty cool.

Well, I gotta go get the boy up. I hope everyone has a fine morning aand a wonderful day.

Mr. Clean

Short note: I full-on shaved my head last night. Here is a pic.

Peace.

Important News via Song

What? Two posts in two days? Well, I have important news.

So yesterday I went to get some tests done and visit my doctor, the standard procedure prior to a chemo cycle. Those of you that have met my doctor know he isn't exactly "Mr. Emotional" (not a bad thing in my opinion).

Well, when I went in he asked me, as he always does, how has my belly been filling up? When I told him that it seems to have stopped filling up he asked (excitedly) how I was feeling. When I told him I was feeling great, almost normal he got overjoyed. I swear I have never seen a doctor so happy.

What this says to me: "The doctor can't tell me that my cancer is going away based on this evidence. However, he feels that the stoppage of fluid buildup in my abdomen is a strong positive indicator for the progress of my treatment. In other words,

IT'S WORKING!!!!!!!

Great news, really. Jen and I are ecstatic, and foresee more great news in the future.

I wanted to post some song lyrics that describe how I feel. This is a good one by Robert Earl Keen that described an evening when things just went right for an unknown reason.

Feelin' Good Again (excerpt) by Robert Earl Keen Jr.

...So I strolled across old Main Street
Walked down a flight of stairs
Stepped into the hall
And saw all my friends were there
A neon sign was flashin' "Welcome come on in"
It feels so good - feelin' good again

My favorite band was playin'
An Otis Redding song
When they sang the chorus
Everybody sang along
Dan and Margarita were swayin' side by side
I heard they were divorcin'
But I guess they let it slide
And I wished I had some money
with which to buy a round

I wished I'd cashed my paycheck
Before I came to town
But I reached into my pocket
Found three twenties and a ten
It feels so good - feelin' good again...

Cancer Sux like a Hoover

A Quick Summary for Newbies

Hey everybody!

I thought I would take this opportunity to provide a recap for people who are just now getting the news of my cancer. For those faithful readers that already know all of this, bear with me. :)

In mid-April, I started to notice my belly getting larger. This isn't the first time this has happened to a 30 year-old, but after I grew out of a new suit in a week, I knew something was wrong. I went to the emergency room and quickly discovered that my abdomen was filling with fluid. Days of tests confirmed that the fluid and all my organs were normal, and no explanation could be found for the fluid.

I had a malignant mole (Melanoma) removed from my back about 6 years ago. I have returned to MD Anderson every six months since for checkups and have not had a problem since. I returned to MD Anderson with my new problem of excess fluid and after an exploratory surgery (via Laparoscopy), Cancer was determined to be the cause.

My peritoneum had developed a covering of Melanoma cells. This is important to understand. The cancer is Melanoma (skin cancer, the same type I had on my back), but it is located inside my body. This means that the cancer mad moved or metastasized. This is generally bad news, and makes my cancer stage 4 (out of 4).

I started chemotherapy at MD Anderson immediately. I have been in and out of the hospital for chemo treatments for the last three months, with periods of feeling good and periods of feeling horrible.

I start my fourth treatment tomorrow as an outpatient. I will take outpatient chemo for 4 days and then go into the hospital for the remainder of my treatment. This will take 5-7 days. After that treatment I will go home to rest for 2-3 weeks before another treatment.

So, how is the treatment working? It is hard to say. Usually, they do a CAT scan, see a big tumor and measure it before and after treatment cycles. The doctors can then say "your tumor has shrunk by 20%; the treatment is effective." With me, my cancer is not visible to X-Rays or CAT scans because it is so thin. The doctors have been watching my fluid buildup in my abdomen as a gauge for how the treatment is working.

Until recently, there was no change in the amount of fluid filling my belly. Since my last treatment though, the fluid has almost stopped filling my belly. I take this as a very good sign.

I have also been feeling great. I remarked to Jennifer on Sunday that I felt normal this weekend. It is an awesome feeling. This too, I take as a good sign.

The only way to know for sure how the treatment is working is to open me up and do another exploratory surgery. The doctors have been talking about doing this after my next treatment. Look for news along this line in about a month (2 weeks of treatment + 2 weeks of rest, then surgery).

Well, there it is. It might have been quicker just to read 3 months worth of posts!

Feel free to email me with questions regarding my treatment or just to chat. You have all been so wonderful and supportive, and are a big factor in my (fingers crossed) recovery. Love you all.

Death to Cancer

Lunch Makes My Day

Ok Ok Ok!

I know I haven't updated in more than a week. I know that everybody is worried about me. I know everyone checks this blog first thing in the morning (as they should). I haven't been busy, my computer hasn't been broken. I have just been lazy about updating. I am sorry, and I will not let it happen again.

So, what has been going on with me? I am sorry to report: not much. I have been out for about 2 weeks and have been enjoying myself and resting.

My day has become centered around one thing: lunch. I have enjoyed meeting people for a good meal almost every day. The highlight so far? Pappa's Seafood with my brother Jordan. I had this AMAZING mesquite grilled redfish and shrimp. Why don't they serve food like that in the hospital? If they did, nobody would want to get discharged (there is that word again).

I made some divinity last week that turned out pretty good. For those that don't know, divinity is a type of candy that is crumbly, white, and usually vanilla flavored with nuts. Mine had halved pecans on it, and it was pretty good. If you have ever tried to make candy in a humid climate, you understand the "luck" involved in having it turn out.

I have decided that we are going to rent an RV for a week to ten day trip sometime next year. I am going to spend the time in between now and then planning it. I welcome any destination (final or intermediate) recommendations. So far, I am thinking either grand canyon or DisneyWorld as the final destination, but I am open to other ideas. Help would be appreciated.

Until just a few days ago, I have been feeling great. I caught some sort of stomach bug on Sunday and have been less than 100% since then, although I have a feeling that I am on the mend. Hopefully I will get to go to lunch today with some old work buddies (my old work, not old buddies).

So, what is coming up? We take Jacob to the circus on Saturday (I'll put a picture up), and I start my next chemo round on Wednesday, July 26. This round will be done outpatient, so I just go to the hospital for 4 hours a day for 4 to 5 days. After that, I will have to go in to get the immunotherapy portion of my treatment. The good news is that I will only be in the hospital for 4 to 7 days! Big change from the 13 I am used to.

Thanks to everyone for the good wishes and prayers, I think they are working so keep it up! :)

I promise not to let it be this long between updates again.

Peace.

Free!

Hello Real World!

I say the real world because when you are in the hospital for almowst two weeks, you can forget that anything happens beyond the door of your room. But, the world does continue to turn even when I am in here, whether I like it or not.

To all of those who wanted to come and visit me and either got a thumbs down or just didn't hear from me in time, I am sorry. As it turns out, this session of immunotherapy was the worst yet. I don't want to go into details, but I have been miserable for 5 days and in no shape to receive visitors. It is over now, they stopped the medicine about 28 hours ago, and it should be out of my bloodstream now, although for some reason I will still feel some of the effects for days.
Some good news: I am going home today! The doctor has pronounced me well enough to be let out, and I should be discharged in a couple of hours (that sounds slightly gross ;) ).

Sorry its a short post, but I am lacking energy and I really don't have much to say. I'll post again from home in a couple of days.

Love you all!

Alright everybody, I know its been over a week since my last post. I can't really claim to be "too busy", so I will just say I had other things on my mind.

The first half of my treatment went well. The started me on the Chemo Wednesday night, and I finished it Sunday night (Monday morning). Just like last time, I tolerated it well, and kept me appetite throughout. In fact the doctor might reccomend that for the next course that I do the chemo part outpatient! I would still have to drive to the hospital everyday for five hours, but I would get to sleep in my own bed!

Now for the second phase of treatment. The doctor decided to start the bio therapy Sunday night, while I was still receieving the chemo. I have been sick since. This drug is really mean. I have eaten so little since I started, you can count it as not eating. I am in really bad shape, but it is just side effects from the new drugs. The same thing happened to me last time. Tonight I ordered a blueberry muffin, applesauce, and cherry jello for dinner...

Now for the good news. My belly does not seem to be filling up with anywhere near as much fluid as last time. The difference is staggering. The last time I was in the hospital, we empties 4 liters a day from my belly (keep in mind they are pumping tons of fluids into my body). This time, in 7 days, we have emptied 7.3 liters (would have been 28). For three days my belly looked the same without emptying. I am going to see how long I can go without pulling any fluid out. Maybe the rest of my stay!

Happy 4th to everybody. Remember what this holiday means. It represents the birth of the greatest country on earth. Give her a good party...

Peace

Ding ding ding! Time for round three!!!

Here I am, sitting in this 12 x 12 prison, drinking orange juice and eating a danish. I guess after three weeks away, I am back in the best hospital in the world...

So I got to my room yesterday around 4:30. Jenny set up the room just the way I like it. You would never guess that I left for three weeks! But I did, and I am back. Time to get back to the business of killing cancer.

I got my first dose of Chemo last night. I don't feel a thing yet. I am taking all the same drugs and dosages as before. They scrapped the idea of a 14 day course and instead want to stick with 5 days of Chemo followed by 4 days of bio with 2-3 days of recovery. I should be out of here by the 9th or so!

So, I am going to try to post something that touches me everything I post. I was listening to Jack Johnson this morning and this snippet of lyrics caught my ear. While most songs of this type talk about what is important in life, this one talks about what is not important.

Gone by Jack Johnson
Look at those fancy clothes.
But these can keep us warm, just like those.
And what about your soul, is it cold?
Is it straight from the mall and ready to be sold?

Cars and phones and diamond rings, bling bling.
Those are only removable things.
And what about your mind does it shine?
Are there things that concern you more than your time?

Gone, going, gone. Everything gone, give a damn.
Gone be the birds when they donÂ’t want to sing.
Gone people, all awkward with their things.
Gone.

By the way, Jack Johnson is awesome. If you don't know who he is, go out and buy his albums "Brushfire Fairytales" and "On and On".

Je t'aime, je t'adore. Quelque le diable voulez-vous encore?
(I love you, I adore you. What the devil else do you want? One of my mom's favorite sayings)

Peace

Hello there friends and family,

Well, I am not going to beat around the bush, I went to the doctor yesterday and all the news wasn't good. I have great news, good news, and bad news.

So the great news: When I had my first brain MRI one and a half months ago, there was a dark spot that the doctors were concerned might be cancer. They weren't convinced 100%, but the possibility was there. My brain MRI from Tuesday shows absolutely no cancer in my brain. Great news!

Now the good news: The object of all these drugs they give me is to shrink and hopefully eliminate the cancer in my body. According to the CT scan I had on Tuesday, the cancer in my belly is "Stable". This means no significant growth or shrinkage. The good news is that it hasn't grown significantly in the last month and a half.

If you just want the good news, stop reading now.

The first piece of bad news has to do with my hospital stay. Because they are afraid I have an infection in my belly, they don't want to start my third round for another week. They sent me home and have my a bottle of antibiotics. I consider this bad news because I don't want to give this cancer a chance to grow.

Second bad news. Like the smudge in my brain, on my first CT scan one and a half months ago, there was a spot on my left lung that they were unsure about. As it turns out, while it hasn't grown, it showed up in the CT scan I had on Tuesday and the doctors are pretty sure its cancer. I can't begin to tell you how much that sucks.

So, I am home for another week. I will post again this weekend. I Love you all.

Ok, here is the scoop.

Today was my last day away from the hospital for a long, long time. Tomorrow, I go in for an entire day of tests. Some of the tests I will be having are MRIs, X-Rays, and Cat Scans. I am having these tests to try and determine if the chemo is working so far (it's called staging).

Unfortunately, I had all those scans before the chemo and they really couldn't see my cancer. It took a surgeon looking with his own two eyes to see it. I guess, no news is good news from the tests tomorrow.

After my tests, I come home and sleep in my bed. Wednesday I go back to meet with the doctor about the tests, and then I get admitted to the hospital for an undetermined amount of time. Before I left last time, the doctor was suggesting a 14 day course of chemo and (bio) immunotherapy. It would go like this: 5 days of chemo, 4 days of bio, then 5 days of chemo, plus 2-4 days of recovery time. End result: 16-18 days in the hospital.

This would start a new phase of treatment. I would officially be spending more time in the hospital then at home.

So, I am not too happy about the hospital stay, but I am encouraged that my doctors want to get aggressive with my treatment. I have been telling them to take off the kid gloves and hurt me (and the cancer), and they are listening.

You all rock for staying in touch with me during this difficult time. I miss you all and hope to see some of you in the hospital visiting me (hint hint).

Love ya,

Jason

As Dr. Nick likes to say, "Hi Everybody!"

So, whats been going on? I have been enjoying my time away from the hospital. Not doing much, just lazing around the house and resting. It is amazing how normal I can be for an hour or so, then I am beat. I just don't have the energy that I used to. Damn Chemo.

I bit the bullet and bought a new XBOX 360. It rocks! I bought Oblivion (which is a role playing game), Project Gotham Racing (super car racing, corvettes, ferraris, etc...), and John Madden Football (OK game, not really into sports games). I love the XBOX and it has helped me fill some of the long hours at home. BTW, if anyone is on XBOX live, my tag is Draki11a. (yes, those are ones instead of ls).

Hmmm, what else? Nothing really. My hair continues to fall out, but still in patches. My belly still fills with fluid, but I don't know if it is more or less than before. I am eating like a horse, but it is still harder to put down dinner than breakfast or lunch.

Here is a picture of Jake. He was "fixing" the chair. How many handymen will work in a diaper?


Ok everyone, I want to leave you with a peom that someone posted in the comment section of my blog. It is dark, but very powerful, and I think describes how I feel perfectly.

William Ernest Henley. 1849–1903

Invictus

OUT of the night that covers me,
Black as the Pit from pole to pole,
I thank whatever gods may be
For my unconquerable soul.

In the fell clutch of circumstance
I have not winced nor cried aloud.
Under the bludgeonings of chance
My head is bloody, but unbowed.

Beyond this place of wrath and tears
Looms but the Horror of the shade,
And yet the menace of the years
Finds, and shall find, me unafraid.

It matters not how strait the gate,
How charged with punishments the scroll,
I am the master of my fate:
I am the captain of my soul.

What this poem says to me:
"Sometimes the only hope to be found comes from within, and that can be enough"

Love you all,
Jason

Yo Yo Yo Yo Yo! J-Dog in the house!

Ok, I am feeling a little nutty this morning. In my defense, I have a lot to be (pleasantly) nutty about.

I am home! I came home the Wednesday evening with little celebration. For those of you who have never had an extended stay in the hospital, coming home means so much. In the end, even with the visitors and constant doctor and nurse visits, hospitals are very lonely. And home, even with Jen at work and Jake at day care, is not very lonely at all. Maybe it's a quirk of spacetime, or just a fact, but being home feels good!

One of my aunts came to stay with us for a few days also, which is very cool. It is so nice to see her, even though she is working during the day too.

Yesterday, Jordan came over and brought lasagne for dinner, not to mention made a salad and an apple pie right there in my kitchen. I love my family.

So how am I doing? Pretty good considering I got a 10-day course of chemo and immunotherapy. I have a bad case of edema (swelling with fluid) in my legs, and something called Red Man syndrome has caused me to break out in a rash over most of my body. Like all the other minor annoyances associated with chemo, it's better than Cancer!

I go back on the 20th, and my doctor is already telling me that he is so pleased with how I have tolerated the chemo, he is considering a 14-day course next time. That would be a 5-day course of chemo, a 4-day course of bio (IL-2) and then another 5-day course of chemo! I am not happy about being the hospital 14+ days again, but the more they give me the better.

Until then, rest and relax. I was thinking of starting a library of video clips for Jake where I talk about my childhood memories. Ever seen "My Life"? Somewhat like that. I might sell my old X-Box on eBay too. Try to save up enough for an X-Box 360 and Oblivion!

Ok. This one is a little long-winded. I promise next time I'll post another picture of my head with no hair so you have something to look forward to. You know who are!

Love you all,

Jason

Hey! Yes, I know its 5:30 in thge morning and I should be sleeping but I have some great news!

My last dose of IL-2 just finished! Yippee Skippee! Time to start getting better. I winder how lonf it will take the nausea ti subsite, but I plan on easting a Schotzky's Sandwich as soond as possible!

Thanks for all the complements on my new hair cut. It is continuing to evolve from army-cut to soft baby's butt cutt, to not hair all all. Updates to come.

Getting Through It

Hello all you people in the real world!

I am sitting here and waiting for my dinner to arrive (more on that later), and I thought I would check in with y'all.

So, I have been feeling pretty crappy since my last post. The doctors say it's either delayed symptoms from the other drugs, or symptoms from the IL-2 that they are giving me right now. Hard to say, and it doesn't really matter. I basically feel nauseated all the time, which hurts my ability to eat.

I have stuck to my goals though, albeit with some slight modifications. My dinner tonight is jello, applesauce, and ginger ale. I am getting up and walking, but I am taking laps around the room instead of going downstairs. I am still believing, and that hasn't changed. I can just imagine these drugs making the cancer feel as horrible as they make me feel :)

So here is the plan. I go home on Tuesday, June 20, I will come back for a battery of tests, and I will meet with the doctor the next day to go over the results. Hopefully, we will have some idea of the effectiveness of the treatment at that point. If it is working, I will immediatly start another course on the 21st. Odds are I'll do 6 courses in total, running tests in-between each 2.

I have had so many visitors! Unfortunately, I have had to turn some away because of how I was feeling at the time. If you are reading this, I still love you guys!

I am not sure what else to say. I am looking forward to going home and recuperating. I cannot wait to feel better again for a week and a half or so :)

Be Cool! Stay in School!

Feeling Down With a Photo

OK. This will be my first "downer" blog entry. However, I promise to post the picture of my bald head at the end of it.

So, this new drug makes me feel horrible! It's called IL-2, and it is a protein that your body makes to pump up the immune system. I wasn't able to keep my dinner from last night or my breakfast from this morning down. That really sucks, because continuing to eat is one of my major goals for this round.

Oh, the doctor's say it is normal. My doctor says don't worry if you don't eat. But I remember how weak I was when I left the hospital last time.

Another benefit of the drug chills and fever. I get the chills and 30 minutes later, I’ve got a fever of 102. It happens about every three hours.

OK, enough bitching. I promised I would post the picture so here it is...

I Love Visitors

Hi everybody! I hope everyone had a good memorial day. Take some time before bed tonight to think about the hundreds of thousands of men and women that have given their live so that we can barbecue, waterski, and relax on this fine day.

It rained in Houston today, spoiling many an outdoor barbecue. I have privileged information that in fact, every one of those barbecues continued successfully somewhere else, so no harm done :) For myself, I had Chick-fil-a for lunch with Jen, Jake, and an old friend from my Anatec Consulting days.

I am still doing well. The stubble on my head is continuing to thin, and my appetite is finally decreasing. I managed a full breakfast and lunch, but dinner didn't do it for me. I ate a lot of it anyway! It was turkey slices and gravy with mashed potatoes. I used my old trick of just mix it all together to mask most of the taste. It worked, enough.

Some friends from school also stopped by to while away the afternoon. It really is nice when people visit. I think I surprise people with how energetic I am. I miss everybody so much. Trust me, if you are reading this, I miss you.

Updates to my treatment:
For those of you who don't know, the last time I was here I received 4 drugs, Vinblastin, Cisplatin, Temodar, and Interferon-A. This time they haven't been giving me the Interferon because of a Staph infection in my belly. It looks like that infection is pretty much whupped (as we say in Texas).

So the new plan is this:
After my course of these three drugs (Vinblastin, Cisplatin, Temodar), I will have a five-day course of both the Interferon-A and Interleuken-II. The second one is a new drug to me, but shows amazing promise for putting patients in my situation into remission, sometimes permanently!

I love you all. I think about you guys all the time and miss you dearly. I am not a praying person, but I am not ashamed to say that I've been praying. Not for my health or a cure, but for the strength to get through this. All of you, you give me strength.

Peace