I woke up this morning and I wasn't sure where I was. Then I remembered "The Cancer".
It sounds terrible but it was actually a good thing. Usually, I can't stop thinking about it. The fact that I forgot for a while, means I have been thinking of something else while I was sleeping.
So here I am, in the hospital. Same basic room (across the hall from where I was last time). Same nurses, blankets, tv shows, etc... I'm officially back.
Some things are different. My hair is gone. Jen and I decided yesterday that we didn't want it to get patchy so we went down to the barber and had it ALL chopped off. I'll upload a picture as soon as I get a chance to take one. It's funny but it doesn't look half as bad as I thought it would. My head gets cold though :)
I feel better than I ever did the last go around. The main reason for that is I started my hospital stay with a surgery last time. This time I am coming off of two week of rest.
I know what to expect, and I packed exactly what I will need.
Still, the things that are the same overwhelm me. Did I even leave?
I am 1/5 of the way through 3 of my 5 drugs. I start the fourth today, and the fifth in four more days. I am excited about this round because I feel like we are trying some new things. Plus, about 2 weeks after this round of chemo, they are going to open me up and take a look around again to check the progress. That will be the real defining moment. Is this working or not? The ten-million dolllar question.
Gonna stick to my goals today. I woke up and cleaned up, and went to the nurses station to MAKE and get coffee. I just ordered a big-ass breakfast and I plan on taking a walk afterwords to get some fresh air. I think the walk will be better if I can make it a morning/afternoon routine.
Oh, my other goal of not focusing on how crappy I feel? I smiled at every person that woke me up in the middle of the night to poke and prod me. :)